Bunny Boilers - Dating Advice

I am dedicating this article to a distinct type of girl which refers to the 'bunny boiler' or psycho girl which many of us guys are familiar with, there are plenty of them around, and don't get me wrong because I am not generalising or being obnoxious. They can be irritating, conceited and they often try and make trouble for you.

The original description was derived from the 1987 film Fatal Attraction where a women has a one night stand with a successful married attorney, refusing to allow the affair to end she becomes obsessed and boils his daughters pet rabbit in an attempt to cause harm to his family life.

There will be plenty of tips in this article on how to steer clear of the crazy ones, get the best of them or give them a taste of their own medicine. I have had my fair share, so I know how to identify all the tricks, sly tactics and character traits which you can use to manipulate and identify them.

They can come in many forms, sometimes very sexy like the woman above, I use the Medusa image because I think the snakes are good metaphor for describing sly and crafty girls who try and harm you, they often use weak men like the ones in the photograph to strive for what they can't have.

An example of this was one girl who was attractive, a single mum who had obviously been messed around in the past and had a chip on her shoulder, who asked me out one date with her. The facebook comment went something along these lines 'Hey Rich, would you by any chance fancy meeting up with me for a coffee, its OK if you don't want to ;)' The important parts to extract from this comment is the ';)' , think about whats shes said, 'its OK if you don't want to' This shows shes not overly concerned, and a wink often means they've thought of something negative about you.

I proceeded to go along with it, I mean, you don't want to blow off a sexy girl straight away.. you can always keep a few around as options in case one turns out to be a mess-around. She sent me photos of her in sexy lingerie to my phone, and I continued to be friendly because I hadn't seen her since school, turns out she knew some people I know from work as well. This sort of attention-seeking with the naughty photos should raise alarm bells that she maybe flaunts it to other guys also. Sure enough a week later after she had ignored my last text about what day we should meet up, she had changed her facebook status to 'in a relationship', I was unaffected by this because I had already had other girls lined up.

A month or so later when she remembered that I had been genuine with her and unaffected by her sly tactics, she text me asking when we were going out. She must have noticed that I was in a relationship now, and thought I was the one that got away and she wanted to see what my game was about. Also it was likely that she wanted to make trouble, hoping my girlfriend would see the text and be suspicious of me, it is a good idea to maybe change your phone number every few years to avoid certain tactics 'bunny boilers' use against you. Also delete any mess around girls you have been out with from your facebook account, they can use this to stalk you or leave harmful comments.

It turns out she was out with another guy when she text me, he was pedestaling her like crazy, I advised him to leave her be when I saw him in work. My response to her text was 'who's this' because I had already washed my hands of her beforehand, and the text just came through as a number, 'she said you know who it is', probably shocked at the fact I'm not one of those guys who hangs on for her attention.

Other tricks girls with issues have is that they will lie like crazy. They will often be very quiet and give you just enough attention to maintain your interest, if they leave it any longer than 2 weeks before meeting up then forget about it, even if they've snogged you like mad. They will make excuses about that they are busy with something, but just have a little think about what they could be busy with and what your busy with,. Its all about personality overview. Like this one who was messing around not replying enough and said she was moving house the weekend I asked her out, ignored me when I said I'd pick her up after she'd finished packing. Two weeks had passed after I started ignoring her and I had comments on my facebook from another girl I know, she was plastering my wall with comments saying 'she misses me and hadn't seen me around for a while'. It was blatantly obvious she had been chasing another guy because I'd seen stuff to indicate this on her bulletins online, my answer to her was 'I thought you'd got back with your ex, you didnt want to go out when I wanted to meet up, you seemed not interested'. Her answer to this was to say, 'for someone so quiet and innocent looking, you love to take pictures of yourself,Vain!!' I was unconcerned by this, I mean it's fine for girls to flaunt themselves in photos, and I have a few nice shots and its called vain, no hun, I just have respect for myself.

They love to be excessive with cute things on their comments because they think you like it and it has you fooled to what they're really like. I always do it back to annoy them, for example reply with something like 'OK hun, see you later. xxxxxxxxxx'.

One girl I know who likes to keep you hanging on, who I'm 'friends' with had recently split up with a guy she was crazy about and who is playing her thought she could use me to make him jealous. Her plan was that if she posted lots of messages on my facebook calling me babe that I would reply insuit, with hindsight I saw this and left her facebook page with famine.

Finally I would like to describe my ex, she was definitely arrogant. She always had to prove you wrong even on little un-important things, normally things you would just forget about in a couple of seconds. As my best mate described her 'she would look for an argument, even where there was no argument'. This all apparently stemmed from bad experiences with ex's who used her and give her low self esteem, but we all know that if you come with respect, you get respect right back. It came to the point where I would sometimes try and avoid saying things, then you get the question 'whats wrong, your very quiet', then an argument would start, which is what eventually lead to our break-up. It was a shame really because she was an interesting girl and we had things in common, I think she will miss me though because I was kind to her. Maybe we were both too competitive but I can't see any guy wanting to be dominated and a girl wanting a guy like that, good luck to her finding what she wants I say!

We tried to end as friends but the conceitedness continued, she was all of a sudden too busy for me to pop around and drop off a few of her things, wanting me to be the one who was 'missing her'. We finished via text message, she said she didn't think things were working out. I tried to explain that a week later I had met another girl(my new lovely girlfriend who isn't arguementative and I have been with 2 months) and asked why she was avoiding me, she certainly didn't like the fact I'd moved on so quick!

Here a few final closing tips I have'nt mentioned so far, these are from way back and I just find them annoying because they are so obvious. These are the prank phone calls, I used a Bart Simpson illustration to describe how childish it is. As I described at the beginning of the article with the single mum, and how I warned the aquaintance in work to steer clear of her, as far as I know she is still giving him a 'merry dance'. He said he is getting withheld phonecalls, this is something they do to keep you hanging on, once you have washed your hands of them they will want you to stay but won't want to reveal it is them. If you are soft and naive you will probably run back, still falling for the same old lies. if you answer the calls, they probably won't speak, doing the classic stalkerish silence for a few seconds before hanging up.

Rule of the game? No answering withheld calls, simple as that! don't be stupid.

One other stealthy one which I only thought of recently is the fake generated profile because I occassionally browse dating sites for girls to chat to. One regular site where I met my ex, I have recieved a diss from her friend, which I ignored and proceeded to change my default to one of me with my new girlfriend. I have also recieved messages from shallow, empty profiles asking me intimate questions and if I was interested casual sex. I then wondered if that was my ex fooling around trying to cause trouble or it could be your girlfriend testing you? You will want to ignore these messages and keep your passwords secret, your not desperate.

I have tried to end the article on a humourous note, including a illustration of Perseus overcoming Medusa and there is also a link to my other article which includes tips on picking up girls.